They’re Mighty Meaty Matey

Once upon a time, there was a company called Drings, that produced a widely-advertised sausage, under the slogan “They’re Mighty Meaty Matey”. I think there might even have been a bit about “…slap ’em on your platey”, but I could be imagining that bit. What I didn’t imagine was that extraordinarily slanted piece of gratuitous…

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Traincrash, Disaster, Devastation, Mayhem, Sadness

Yesterday started brilliantly. I had done the form very early on Saturday morning and, despite slipping on ice and crashing to the ground at 1:00 am, I was none the worse for wear. The cataract operation, (done on Monday), is on course for the Outstanding Performance by the NHS award and four days later, I…

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The weekend rolls on

I’m quite relieved to be socially unattached today. My TV and a roaring planet-destroyer are calling with Racing, EuroFooty, Grand Prix and maybe even a bit of left-over take-away Chinese washed down with beer and no glass … a real boys-at-home “Slack Order” day. Yesterday could have worked out better on the tipping front –…

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Those magnificent men still happily at it

My monthly perusal of Drone Wars, while always entertaining, this time contained some proper Sit-Up-Straight-and-Pay-Attention news. It was, in summary, this little insight. Throughout the UK’s air campaign over Syria and Iraq, between October 2017 and September 2019, the RAF’s Tornados, Typhoons and Reaper drones attacked 499 ISIS targets. The cost of the ordinance detonated…

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You asked – we answered

Crikey, I hear you say, I thought The Tissue had gone on holiday to Georgia for his annual Penguin Counting Festival, did his flight get cancelled? No, gentle reader, I have merely pulled the transport to the side of the island’s airport to provide The Judge’s precise and very correct answers. The first question came…

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Syria 0 Turkey 0 – USA 0 Russia 0

It was once suggested that the US has never actually had a foreign policy per se, but rather it has simply destabilised any region thus occupying the perceived antagonists of the US, at any given moment in time. If that is true, it is perhaps the explanation of what is happening in Turkey and Syria…

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Capt. Knees back in the fold

I am delighted to announce that I shall be taking my annual holiday on Georgia, counting the Penguins and ensuring that the ice in my Gin is as fresh as possible. Meanwhile, Capt. Kneesup has managed to pay off the debts he incurred after mortgaging the house, selling Lady Kneesup, and visiting Burly Betty, the…

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Mea Maxima Culpa… it’s work (ed)

Darlings, I fear that unless you collectively glance at the pages without my sending you a reminder. you will miss both the opportunities our tips regularly present. The first alternative world is one where you recuperate from a busy lunchtime cocktail of Brasso and Red Rull, under the arches at Charing Cross, having invested in…

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