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Massively under-exercised

Capt. Kneesup

Capt. Kneesup

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Dear old Mark Twain, who could be something of a dark cove when it came to amusing, intelligent writing, once said:

“I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.”

That about sums up the current Kneesup predicament, as untroubled sleep has been evading me of late and knackeration can be a grinding thing. I know, I know…. we’ve all got chums who are in much worse condition, and are suffering a thousand cuts a day, each more painful than the last. I pray for them all and I care. Truly.

Of course I also know that it is, in part, self-inflicted and is largely down to Emma, a girl who (not for the first time in my life) pursuaded me that I’d have more fun if I stayed up late and watched her play. The Hon Plantagenet joined me in this late night threesome, and we stayed up watching and cheering until near 4:30.

The recovery time from such a night is frightening. My body clock, has springs that have been so badly overwound that I woke four times last night, (admittedly following another quiet supper out), and as far as I can tell, pretty well in line with each of Emma’s semi-final court moments. On Court – Win 1st Set – Win 2nd Set – Off Court.

I would thank God and all the angels that she is playing at a decent time tonight, and then, perhaps with a Steak Frites or a small chicken Caesar Salad and a bottle of Chateau Glugging 2019, would have watched her win in two straight sets. If she does that, the number of records she will set, (that will never be beaten), will establish her for life and our Country’s spirits will be lifted and all will be well with the world.

But I can’t. Instead I am called to a posh party with the Cotswold mob. Were I the hostess I might abandon any existing plans for Spitfire Flypasts, appearances by Ronnie Woods and his Blues Boys with Beyonce on vocals, and simply install a giant screen, serve dinner at seven, watch tennis at nine and dance from eleven. That would be a really cracking party – but it won’t happen. Instead there will be masses of people not having conversations and staring at their phones, or worse they’ll all look like US Secret Service agents with little black plastic bits in their ears, and they’ll suddenly shout, “Yes!” like some Mrs Duberly in the throes of Cardigan’ lust.

I am of course assuming that Emma isn’t kidnapped by Greta, Keir, Boris and a host of other well-meaning but deeply irritating people, whose lack of self-doubt on the moral certitude of their position means they never have time, nor interest in another opinion. (Sorry, strike Boris from that list.) If that happens I shall stop wishing I had Emma as a daughter and instead consider cutting her off without a penny. Please Emma I’m begging you – don’t become a Woke Ambassador,  “… using my fame which has provided me with this ability to influence and change so many lives for the better and to promote the values I have held sacred all my life.” to paraphrase The Duchess of Tinseltown.

So many conflicting interests, so much sport, so much drinking, so much research, I wish I had time to exercise! Best I find my ear buds for tonight and kick on….

SATURDAY RACING

1:10 LEOPARDSTOWN KPMG Champions Juvenile Stakes (G2) (2yo) 1m

STONE AGE e/w

1:40 LEOPARDSTOWN Coolmore America “Justify” Matron Stakes (G1) (Fillies & Mares) (3yo+) 1m

MOTHER EARTH Win

1:45 DONCASTER Portland Hcap Cl2 (3yo+) 5½f

MONDAMMEJ Win – INTRINSIC BOND e/w

2:00 CHESTER tote+ Stand Cup Stakes (Listed Race) Cl1 (3yo+) 1m4½f

THRONE HALL Win – VINDOLANDO e/w

2:10 LEOPARDSTOWN Clipper Logistics Boomerang Mile (G2) (3yo+) 1m

FEV ROVER e/w

2:20 DONCASTER Champagne Stakes (G2) (Colts & Geldings) Cl1 (2yo) 7f

Back him for the Guineas now

REACH FOR THE MOON Win

2:35 CHESTER Homeserve Hcap Cl3 (4yo+ 0-95) 1m6½f

HOCHFELD Win

2:45 LEOPARDSTOWN Irish Champion Stakes (G1) (3yo+) 1m2f

TARNAWA Win

3:00 DONCASTER Cazoo Park Stakes (G2) Cl1 (3yo+) 7f

LANEQASH Win

3:15 LEOPARDSTOWN Paddy Power Stakes (G3) (3yo+) 1m4f

FORBEARANCE Win – LEO DE FURY e/w

3:35 DONCASTER Cazoo St Leger Stakes (G1) (No Geldings) Cl1 (3yo) 1m6½f

The market here might best be the “Betting Without The Favourite”. I cannot see past HURRICANE FLY who we have backed all season, but I think the forecast might be with SIR LUCAN and he 15/1 in the BWF market.

SIR LUCAN (BWO 8/1 Bet Victor)

16:05 DONCASTER

TYSON FURY Win

17:10 DONCASTER

TESTON e/w.

 

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