Punchestown and The Guineas. Col. Tufty Bufty tells Lawrence what he thinks of the entries

45 runners declared for the whole Newmarket card… what can I say? At Goodwood in the 3:50, there is £40k in guaranteed prize money, with five runners. Why?? It can’t be on the ground conditions; it was G/S when the final decs were called. Its – Its… what is the word???

Meanwhile, the frantic social whirl pressure continues. On Friday, I shall be in London celebrating the soon-to-be wedding of a good mate who has decided that at 70-something, it is time he tried marriage. It is, to be fair, an experiment he has conducted several times before, but on this occasion, we are both confident that the runes are all good. It is not so much a Stag Do, as a gentle dinner with Venison.

On Saturday, a friend has invited us to a Guineas Lunch. This is rapidly becoming the norm. Do I need to hoik myself over to Newmarket, get stabbed on my way to lunch in The Jockey Club Rooms or have a drink spilt down my trousers – or worse – in the Gents? The same can be said of Ascot. Yet another message from the course today imploring me to become part of the scene, share my hat, wear a corset, or some such nonsense. The trouble is they are employing Yahoos who have confused shouty “Made In Chelsea” enthusiasm for the quiet manners, etiquette and thrill of seeing very good bloodstock in action. Then there are the horses. No, increasingly, the answer is to spend the equivalent of the badges you have not bought for yourself and your wife and invest that sum instead on a delicious lunch party for your chums while watching the TV coverage.

I also have to see the knee-man tomorrow because the damned limb remains sore and unhappy. The unbalanced gait has left me even more wonky in the back department, but I have found a marvellous – so far – back-cracker in Hungerford who went at it this afternoon. As my old Nanny used to say when she returned from running some soup kitchen down at the docks: “You know it’s all working when you’re knackered and sore!”

Talking of unsteady and unbalanced, here are today’s selections for across the water and on the box.

ITV RACES

2:25 NEWMARKET William Hill Newmarket Stks Cl1 (3yo) 1m2f 5 run

ENDLESS VICTORY 5 pts Win

2:40 GOODWOOD British Stallion Studs EBF Restricted Novice Stks Cl2 (2yo) 5f 7 run

CARDEROCK 2 pts e/w

3:00 NEWMARKET William Hill Epic Boost Hcap Cl2 (4yo+ 0-105) 7f 13 run

You might remember we have backed THUNDER BALL before – we shall do so again in the hope that a drop back to 7f  will see a winning run.

THUNDER BALL 3 pts e/w

3:15 GOODWOOD William Hill Epic Value Hcap Cl3 (4yo+ 0-90) 6f 9 run

BISHOP’S CROWN won a decent Donny nursery at the end of last season, and looks to have improved over the winter when winning cosy at Windsor LTO. The handicapper’s extra 6lb still might not be enough to prevent a hat-trick. SPANISH STAR loves Goodwood; his fourth course win was in this race last year. His seasonal debut saw him perform well on his seasonal reappearance with a 1l 4th of 16 at Newbury a fortnight ago. This was a good effort from his draw away from the action, and he is at his last winning mark. He also took the same race route last year.

SPANISH STAR 4 pts Win –  ALCAZAN 2 pts e/w

3:35 NEWMARKET William Hill King Charles II Stks (Listed Race) Cl1 (3yo) 7f 6 run

BOLD STYLE 3 pts Win

3:50 GOODWOOD William Hill Epic Boost Hcap Cl2 (4yo+ 0-105) 5f 5 run

If there is no additional rain and the course starts to dry out, then CLARENDON HOUSE must have some money. He was 2nd in this two years ago of 99, and his current mark of 107 reflects his efforts in a Meydan Group 2 and a Listed Southwell race.

CLARENDON HOUSE 4 pts Win

4:10 NEWMARKET William Hill Jockey Club Stks (G2) Cl1 (4yo+) 1m4f 6 run

The 3lb sex allowance for TIME LOCK will I think, end CASTLE WAY’s aspirations. You might remember her run in The Dubai Stakes last year, and it is probably the best form on display here.

TIME LOCK 5 pts Win

PUNCHESTOWN

3:40 Stanley Asphalt Hunters’ Chs for the Bishopscourt Cup (4yo+) 2m4½f 10 run

BROWN MONDAY 2 pts e/w

4:15 EMS Copiers Novice Hcap Chs (5yo+) 2m4½f 17 run

Off a mark of 128 and rated at 143 over hurdles DUFFLE COAT has been knocking at the door for some time. His photo finish at Downpatrick was meant to be it- he can make amends today and at 25s is simply too big to ignore.

PERCIVAL LEGALLOIS 6 pts Win – DUFFLE COAT 3 pts e/w

4:50 Hanlon Concrete Irish EBF Glencarraig Lady Francis Flood Mares Chs (G2) (5yo+) 2m4½f 7 run

As you may know, I have a soft spot for Gavin Cromwell, who I think is a real grafter who fights his corner 247. BRIDES HILL has improved all season, and her Huntingdon win was imposing. She arrives here in absolutely peak condition.

BRIDES HILL 6 pts Win

5:25 Event Power Champion Hunters’ Chs (4yo+) 3m½f 14 run

Only for the Craic – a Fat Gordy Course winner with a 7lb claimer who was 7th in The Foxhunters has been placed here four times from eight runs. At 100/1 I give you HARDLINE. Of course the favourite should win – but pure greed will make you enjoy this more!

HARDLINE 1 pt e/w

6:00 Boodles Champion Hdl (G1) (4yo+) 2m 4 run

Champion Hurdle winner STATE MAN who is unbeaten on four starts at Punchestown will be a short price to make it five.

No Bet

6:35 Alanna Homes Champion Novice Hdl (G1) (4yo+) 2m4½f 6 run

State Man’s stablemate and top novice hurdler BALLYBURN is another short-price favourite to follow up his Cheltenham Festival success.

No Bet

7:05 Uniquely Novice Hdl (4yo+) 2m 15 run

LARK IN THE MORNIN 5 pts Win – MONTECAM 2 pts e/w

7:40 Howden Insurance Brokers INH Flat Race (5-7yo) 2m3f 22 run

TRADECRAFT 2 pts Win