Punchestown Day 4
This looks like a day for favourites – or certainly top of the market players. I have suggested doing an accumulator at the bottom of the page, but I quite like the look of the last race, where I can see surprises being sprung.
The Guineas Meeting Day 1
It isn’t every day that we pull a 25/1 winner out of the hat, but that is what we did in the Bumper yesterday at Punchestown. We also had several decent e/w shots and at one time I thought we were in with a shout of taking the La Touche – but like so much […]
Punchestown Day 3
Unlike other racing columns, this one is totally transparent in keeping its readers abreast of its own follies. Yesterday, and not to put too fine a point on it, finding winners was easy peasy if you simply stuck to Mullins and ignored most previous form. We had one winner in the outstanding Facile Vega and […]
Punchestown Day 2
Not the worst day I’ve ever had at Punchestown, helped by a winner and a couple of places, which in turn were helped by the resurgence of Elliott and the skills of Jack Kennedy who was riding brilliantly. I was cross at my own dismissal of Mighty Potter as a third-placer, when I only mentioned […]
Well Done Peter O’Sullevan Lambourn Open Day
I don’t know about Middleham, but in lovely Lambourn, the sun hit some 20º, and the day was glorious. The streets were packed with thousands of racing enthusiasts, several hundreds of members of a simply curious public, and what felt like thousands of children. So I quit the throng sometime after two, having seen enough […]
Race, kick, run, vroom vroom Sleep
If Cheltenham moves to five days, this is what this morning will feel like – except you’ll have to put your tweeds on, kick the empty bottles and the knackered spaniels aside and head for Cleeve Hill again. I don’t know how trainers do it… we were back home by 11:00 pm, but on our […]
The Last Post of Cheltenham
There was a moment on Thursday when the Kneesup world took a definitive turn for the worse. Not the excessive prices that Cheltenham has been charging for a Pint of Guinness, nor the ludicrous absence of mobile signal in the 21st century; nor the woeful and controlled wifi signal that allows you to only bet […]
Cheltenham Thursday St Patrick’s Day
I have just read some unutterable drivel that suggests that the Turners Novice Chase, while not totally brilliant with only the four horses competing in a championship race, is somehow still great, (and thus excusable), because we will actually get a great match race between Bob Olinger and Galopin Des Champs, and neither will be […]
The Cheltenham Question
I had a jolly Fish and Chip supper at a local pub last night with my old friend The FinTech Brain, and while inventing a new and delicious dessert (one scoop each of Blood Orange and Gin Sorbets covered in a shot of Cointreau), we cruised around the conversational islands of Paralympic Curling, Olympic 3-day […]
The Archers, The Camorra and North Korea
This last week I found myself moved by various snippets of writing that gave me unexpected pleasure. Among those was a small segment of The Archers in which the subject of miscarriage and stillbirth was discussed. Normally in the Archers, such matters can, and often do, sound like patronising public service broadcasts for Zombie Aliens. […]
OFGEM: Office that Forgot to Get Energy Made
It is morning. You sit at your table, the sideboard creaks with chaffing dishes keeping the devilled kidneys a point, the poached eggs at a perfectly-held softness, the grilled tomatoes sweetened with their own caramelisation ready to support the saltiness of the dry-cured streaky from a Gloucester Old-Spot. Scrote, the hunched family retainer, brings in […]
Sunday’s racing tips and the DRF
We managed to claw a bit back on Saturday and ended up +10.35pts. The Treble crashed out on the first leg but provided two odds-on winners and we also tipped 9/4 – 9/2 – 6/1 and two other places including a 33/1 shot IF THE CAP FITS. I am still cross that I swerved Paul […]
I am Spartacus, but please don’t crucify me.
Like all good Catholics, lapsed or otherwise, I struggle to keep my sins to myself. The need to cleanse one’s soul and expunge all guilt lies firmly within the beating breast of the Kneesup clan, tempered only by the corollary to all confessions – don’t try to mitigate your responsibility and lessen the punishment by […]
Knickers to the Aga – and the Chinese spies
One of my favourite readers, Mrs Banshee from Kent, sent me a kindly and charming note outlining her concern at my Aga woes. The Aga, she wrote, is not for cooking… “Rather it is for drying one’s knickers on, as everyone who has one knows”. Now call me old-fashioned, but when very attractive women start […]
2021 – Half-full at best.
A slow and steady start to the day after a delicious beano last night. Chums from Warwickshire who had been dining elsewhere came to inspect the property and deemed it Good. With some alacrity, much instant planning took place, the Garage had been converted to a swimming pool and spa, and my study was moved […]
Look out – it’s the feast of Stephen
Very little time is left now for a preamble. I still fear that the medical panjandrums will force the Government’s hand and my SPAD-based tip of a lockdown on 28th December for three weeks, has still not been rescinded. Still and all, we kept Christmas Day which for us was spent away from the tip, […]
There are moments when tis wise to stay shtum
I don’t know about you gentle readers, but about every six weeks, the old fleas start to scratch and you know it’s time for the barber. In my case, the barber is a raven-haired and good-looking woman, who has an Arthurian name and she has cared for my hair, for at least the last five […]
QIPCO British Champions Day
A quiet lunch in East Garston, where I see the shoot wagon bringing in hungry souls all sporting long woollen socks and rather bizarrely in one case a pair of Gucci deck shoes. Dinner with friends including my chum Carlisle, in a pub in the Filkins where a log fire blazes. I call him Carlisle […]
A tricky day’s racing, in a week full of tosh.
I just spent two hours writing a preamble that was just another tired rant and I realised that it was pointless. There are simply too many people out there who think The Duchess of LaLa Land is a good egg; that no one is to blame when newbuilds on floodplains collapse and leave families destitute; […]
The Ebor, York and TV racing
I wondered last night over a pint, whether there were wise old men in Sodom and Gomorrah, who, as the great fire rained down and their entire world was turned to dust, stood on the Citadel walls and with their last few scorched breathes said: “There. I told you God existed and Lumme can he […]
The Ebor Festival. York Races Day 1
There are days when you might think Huzzah, York races and the Ebor will soon be upon us. Your spirits are lifted because the wind is moderate, and all the clouds are louring over someone else’s house and are buried in someone else’s bosomy ocean. True there may not be much sun, but it will […]
Newmarket Day 3 and the ITV races.
Not the most sparkling Friday, and I apologise. I think there are days when one is simply trying to over-deliver – certainly I overthought it. There was nothing among the winners that really surprised me, but I never even discussed them, and indeed I dismissed a number on the grounds of price rather than ability. […]
Newmarket July Meeting Day 2
Yesterday’s Raceweb advisory was a tale of two halves. On the real and considered side of the equation, we were +4pts with a win and two decent places. Then in the second half I also referenced an amusing possible Ryan Moore Across the card “fun” bet, by which, I hope you understand, I mean very, […]
The Derby
While that wretched Liberal-wet, Green-belt-destroying PM has failed to make 4th June a National Holiday, (he’s always looked like he’d have been happier at Harrow), I cannot hold him responsible for the slow start to my Feast Day. No man can start such a day with no brekker, a mug of tea and a dash […]
The Dante Meeting Day 2
Yesterday – I discovered appropriately today – was National Diary Day. In that vein, yesterday’s selections weren’t so appalling, but still, we were down a point for the day and all of it the 3l difference between the winner and Raymond Tusk at 40/1. I take no comfort in the words of one of my […]
Cheltenham Day 3
With the sad inevitability of the unsinkable ship travelling at speed and an enormous stationary iceberg, I suspect my Cheltenham maybe gashed below the waterline. I tried to enthuse about Tiger Roll’s victory and Cheltenham five-timer, honestly. I was thrilled for Ms Blackmore, who isn’t a female but is a jockey. (Broadcaster please note). I […]
At Last – Some Irish Craic
I am aware that many of the Trends in this section are negative, but I hope will allow the reader to avoid backing horses that probably won’t win unless The Baby Jesus gets involved. This stat however has a solid base and forms a good platform for further investigation. It has produced a profit on […]
Of Course you can – but not that Course and not here
This trend continues the theme of horses that are unlikely to win, based on their last race. In this case, they have had the misfortune of being unable or unwilling to have their final Cheltenham prep race other than at these tracks. Personally I think some of these tracks are delightful, but for whatever reason, […]
Don’t be handicapped by inexperience
Bizarrely you would think that taking 7lbs off a decent handicap hurdler, might give one a fighting chance with Honest Bob, bookie to the gentry. I hate to disillusion you, or indeed to remove the experiential crust from the plate of young Ignatius O’Hare, claiming jockey to Mr Jumps-Ditch. But here’s something to consider about […]
The Wellchild Cheltenham Gold Cup
22nd February 2021 Willie Mullins talking about AL BOUM PHOTO: I’ll give him a big bit of work this week. He’s in great shape. He worked well last week and he’s a big bit of work coming up this week. He’s uncomplicated, he’s very nice to train. I didn’t think when we were buying him […]
Ballymore Hurdle
8th February 2021 GAILLARD DU MESNIL got things underway at Leopardstown’s Dublin Racing Festival, with a brilliant performance in the opener. The five-year-old was cut into favourite with most bookmakers for the race. 8/1 before the race, he’s now a best price of 7/2 and 3/1 with a number of firms. Sent off 13/8 favourite […]
Racing – with not a drink in sight
On Thursday Lockdown 2 started. The Butcher, The Baker, The Candlestick Maker, all remain open and three Huzzahs for them. That isn’t however the case for all the places in which I have felt safest, most comfortable and welcomed – and which we will all miss dreadfully. Until someone can produce hard facts that show […]
Time to get some back after a poverty-inducing week in America
I thought that by the time you read this, my fate would be sealed and I’d have done some big biscuits on the US Presidential Election. Indeed, a steady stream of “concerned” citizens has been calling me to deliver snippets they thought I needed to know. One such was from a distinguished CFO, who’s concerned […]
North vs South? Relax – I’m talking Hemispheres in Melbourne
If you happen to be up at 4:00 am this coming morning, you could actually watch The Melbourne Cup. Give it another 24 hours and you could watch the USA election. Several sleepless hours after that, the Breeders Cup Classic will be on around 00:30. Let’s face it, not much will be happening here, so […]
Saturday’s Charlie Hall, ITV Racing Tips while Imperial drones on
A close friend of mine, the Time-Life photographer Peter Jordan popped in for a coffee today. As a front-line photo-journalist, he’s seen and done much in terms of recording war, plague, famine, politics and life’s vagaries. Both of us can generally find something to laugh at when times are tough and in our separate ways, […]
Cheltenham – The first day of the new season
A great chum called me this week to tell me the exciting, indeed brilliant news, that he had had a 40/1 winner in Ireland. He further explained that no, the trainer hadn’t told him it was on; that no, he hadn’t backed it; that, yes, his fellow owner in this (beautifully-bred) nag had also had […]
The last few Flat races with Aidan’s Whateveritsnameis the possible winner
After my suggested advice to Annamarie yesterday, my post box was flooded with the following note from my old friend and former intelligent officer, 006½ who represents a number of senior racing connections: Perhaps you should have mentioned the disgracefully lazy racecourses. Some now cannot even provide a decent meal for the stable staff who […]
Twenty Racing Tips, and a provable Profit
I feel the urge to spread my bonhomie around the minor counties and so later today I shall progress to Dorsetshire. I very much doubt that we shall see more than six people all weekend. A quiet supper on Friday, dinner on Saturday with a charming couple, perhaps Mass on Sunday at The Church of […]
Earwigging is bad for your mental health
My office lies just north of the memsahib’s and so it is only a matter of switching off the selective deafness mode to catch the full conversational flow, surely the nearest thing to Perpetual Motion. Thus I discovered that she misses smelling like a horse. Sadly I too missed something – one or two vital […]
The Ig Nobel shortlist for horserace tipping includes …
After yesterday, I feel as though I deserve a nomination if nothing else. Three seconds, two thirds and a winner – admittedly in the Ayr Bronze Cup – but still, somehow a disappointment. In case you are one of those entirely in the dark, on the subject of Ig Nobel awards, I received news of […]
Doncaster St Leger meeting Day 3
The long and complicated story of Phoenix Thoroughbreds is a million miles from being either understood or fully exposed. It involves a Bulgarian-based crypto-currency Ponzi scheme, the FBI, a man called Amer Abdulaziz Salman, who owns various companies that have the word Phoenix attached to them, a lawyer called Scott, (part of whose testimony ran […]
Doncaster’s Leger meeting Day 1 TV Races
The twilight of the Flat season is creeping in, with talk about the Arc and Melbourne Cup betting markets, and emails containing the words “Breeders Cup” become increasingly prevalent. The chill draught of a disappearing summer; ground that veers between motorway and bog; handicap marks receiving their annual dusting off, all suggest that “The Sticks” […]
Racing Tips, F1 Tips, Tips fromthe US of A – when am I going to jog?
A profitable day yesterday thanks to JUAN LES PINs winning at 11/1 and watching a rerun of his cracking race will set you up nicely for the rest of the day. Jeepers, that Tom Marquand is good. Over in the increasingly tense world of Formula 1, we saw the departure of Sir Frank Williams and […]
An acceleration of the inevitable
This post’s title was contained within an interesting article on the ecosystem in which pubs, clubs, restaurants, breweries and landlords all have to live. With around 30% of pubs and bars still shut, and with some experts suggesting 20% of pubs will not survive the next six months, the article suggested that the pubco ecosystem […]
The dangers from Covid are far greater than being ill
I feel sorry for jockey Ben Curtis, who has been publically hauled over the coals as he scrabbles to earn a crust out of a single ride at – and being ejected from – Newmarket by the Thomson and Thompson Twins. Tintin’s comic book heroes always displayed a sense of self-righteousness that however commendable nearly […]
York Ebor Day 4 – The Road to Damascus in a combination forecast
While the power went off and on and my desktop went tonto, I had time yesterday to reflect on how one might have done better this week. Sure we had a cracking start, yes we tipped some winners, yes we’re in profit – but that is mainly because we headed down the “exotics” avenue and […]
Has the flaw in our algorithm been discovered?
As the person in charge of Raceweb, I feel obliged to point out that all Raceweb’s advisory notes – and do remember, these are not instructions – are based on well-researched and scientifically sound data. The data is compiled by people who have devoted their lives to the accuracy of their work. Sadly, because they […]
Goodwood Day 4 – Bunny would not approve
Dinner with Sam Hoskins and other chums last night, at another pub that has decided that C19 is an excuse not a reason to try harder. Sam is down to support his KVT members and their runner SIR BUSKER today. We have an engaging conversation, but close by, a man keeps trying to catch Sam’s […]
Goodwood Day 3
The Keeper of The Privy Purse or the Hon. Kneesup as she prefers to be known, has berated me for failing to provide adequate description of our current circumstances. Thus, I have to tell you, that since Monday night and until tomorrow, we have been in residence at The Park House Hotel, Bepton, West Sussex. […]
Goodwood Day 2
Not a bad day at the coal face, and my call on Stradivarius’ race was bang-on. Well that’s enough preamble…