After yesterday, I feel as though I deserve a nomination if nothing else. Three seconds, two thirds and a winner – admittedly in the Ayr Bronze Cup – but still, somehow a disappointment. In case you are one of those entirely in the dark, on the subject of Ig Nobel awards, I received news of…
Author: Capt. Kneesup
All of Ayr, some of Newbury and decent Golf
A very decent start to the USGA Open and the course appears to have been far kinder than anticipated. We have a brace sharing second place, one who needs to get a wriggle on, and I fear one who won’t make the cut. I am hoping to be able to “Green Out” by close of…
Another Massacre or a simple game of Golf?
Tomorrow sees the start of the 120th US Open at Winged Foot. The course is notoriously difficult, and if you’re expecting to see the world’s top players consistently scoring under par, think again. The last time it was here was 2006, and the Tillinghast-designed course will play over 7,400 yards, or what is known as…
SUNDAY 13th September The Curragh and Paris Longchamp
As brief as I can be: 1:00 LONGCHAMP Qatar Prix du Petit Couvert ( G3) (3yo+) (Sprint Course) (3yo+) 5f SKY 8 run TOUR TO PARIS is decent winning the Prix du Gros-Chene at Deauville in good style. COEUR DE PIERRE is of interest and Karl Burke sends LADY IN FRANCE who picks up a…
St Leger Day – Doncaster Day 4
Four winners yesterday including a 40/1 shot and a 17/2 (backed down from 10s), heralded the beginning of a busy weekend of top quality racing action, both here, Ireland, France and Germany. The 40/1 shot was trained by Nigel Tinkler, whose father Colin effectively rewrote the rules on syndication, with Full Circle, which at one…
Doncaster St Leger meeting Day 3
The long and complicated story of Phoenix Thoroughbreds is a million miles from being either understood or fully exposed. It involves a Bulgarian-based crypto-currency Ponzi scheme, the FBI, a man called Amer Abdulaziz Salman, who owns various companies that have the word Phoenix attached to them, a lawyer called Scott, (part of whose testimony ran…
Donny St Leger Day 2
A poor start to the morning with an unexpected trip to somewhere miles away with an equally unexpected bill; an unplanned detour to another place less far, but as tiresome; the failing computer not improving; but luckily, I suppose, some resolution to the burning question “Why are we spending £2,000 a day on feeding the…
Doncaster’s Leger meeting Day 1 TV Races
The twilight of the Flat season is creeping in, with talk about the Arc and Melbourne Cup betting markets, and emails containing the words “Breeders Cup” become increasingly prevalent. The chill draught of a disappearing summer; ground that veers between motorway and bog; handicap marks receiving their annual dusting off, all suggest that “The Sticks”…
Racing Tips, F1 Tips, Tips fromthe US of A – when am I going to jog?
A profitable day yesterday thanks to JUAN LES PINs winning at 11/1 and watching a rerun of his cracking race will set you up nicely for the rest of the day. Jeepers, that Tom Marquand is good. Over in the increasingly tense world of Formula 1, we saw the departure of Sir Frank Williams and…
An acceleration of the inevitable
This post’s title was contained within an interesting article on the ecosystem in which pubs, clubs, restaurants, breweries and landlords all have to live. With around 30% of pubs and bars still shut, and with some experts suggesting 20% of pubs will not survive the next six months, the article suggested that the pubco ecosystem…
The dangers from Covid are far greater than being ill
I feel sorry for jockey Ben Curtis, who has been publically hauled over the coals as he scrabbles to earn a crust out of a single ride at – and being ejected from – Newmarket by the Thomson and Thompson Twins. Tintin’s comic book heroes always displayed a sense of self-righteousness that however commendable nearly…
York Ebor Day 4 – The Road to Damascus in a combination forecast
While the power went off and on and my desktop went tonto, I had time yesterday to reflect on how one might have done better this week. Sure we had a cracking start, yes we tipped some winners, yes we’re in profit – but that is mainly because we headed down the “exotics” avenue and…
What is a forecast
What Is A Straight Forecast? A bet requiring specific selections to finish in specific positions, such as Chelsea to win the league and Man City to come second, this is a single stake and will only win if the selections finish in that order. What Is A Reverse Forecast? A bet requiring selections to finish…
York Day 3 – and Alastair Down in love again
The world turns in a curious circle. On the tipping front yesterday, there was the inevitable correction from the excesses of the first day and we had two wins, two seconds and a fourth, shedding ten hard-earned points from our profit. I was distracted, however, by news during the day that one of the KVT…
Many unhappy returns from The Nanny Goat – plus York Day 2 Tips
A pretty good day having advised 4 winners at 18/1, 10, 9/1 and 9/2 and a couple of exotics which showed a near 46 pt profit. Overall we’re 88pts up after Day 1, but I wonder whether we would all be quite so delighted had I advised you to bet on The Tote. I shall…
Has the flaw in our algorithm been discovered?
As the person in charge of Raceweb, I feel obliged to point out that all Raceweb’s advisory notes – and do remember, these are not instructions – are based on well-researched and scientifically sound data. The data is compiled by people who have devoted their lives to the accuracy of their work. Sadly, because they…
A Grey day for a Kneesup lie-down
It is that time of year again, when Lady Kneesup, the former debutante Isadora Ablative-Courgette, haemorrhages cash like a Chancellor trying to save the nation’s economy. Simply put, she has created a “wagering system”, I use the term advisedly, that only requires one to back all the Grey horses in a race. Additionally, however, the…
Friday racing – the De Souza theory
Just a quicky in order to share with you some flags that have been raised from my database and trends generator – which is more accurate than an A level algorithm, as I can actually see the real results! Firstly Silvestre de Sousa. Brilliant on certain tracks at winning from the front. Among those is…
A quick look at Sunday’s sporting picture.
The world is unevenly divided between those who read Raceweb and those who do not. One hopes that those who do read Raceweb might also have an online account, which affords them the ability to have a £1 each-way bet or even £2 to win on our selections. Those who don’t read our thoughts, or…
The PHE and the PGA – Statistics only tell half the story
A reader writes that she is confused by my writing about “ball games”, and that “strokes in regulation” means nothing to her. I am much the same with equestrian tack, racing bridles and bits. The Triabit is in every sense a bit of a mouthful, (ED: Stop that immediately) and do not get me started…
The PGA Championship
Work has once again raised its ugly head and my mind is full of useful words like “…unifying points of entry”. No, me neither, but I popped them into the report anyway! I also quite liked the idea of my “…collaboratively transforming our asset-base of frictionless resources.” Meanwhile, the first few pairs are out and…
Goodwood, The Results. Also Windsor, The Systems
Firstly, the Goodwood results. Based on an e/w bet of 1pt e/w, and a winning bet of 2pts to win, we turned over 120 pts. We also had 3 forecast bets for 10 pts. Our return was exactly 260.39 pts, or to put it another way, we doubled our money. We had six winning bets…
Capt. Kneesup is unwell. His column has been undertaken by The Tissue
Apologies for this, but CK was last seen trying to climb the scaffolding of The Goodwood House Hotel, singing a crude variation of The Marsellaise. With such little notice, I hope you will forgive the brevity.
Goodwood Day 4 – Bunny would not approve
Dinner with Sam Hoskins and other chums last night, at another pub that has decided that C19 is an excuse not a reason to try harder. Sam is down to support his KVT members and their runner SIR BUSKER today. We have an engaging conversation, but close by, a man keeps trying to catch Sam’s…
Goodwood Day 3
The Keeper of The Privy Purse or the Hon. Kneesup as she prefers to be known, has berated me for failing to provide adequate description of our current circumstances. Thus, I have to tell you, that since Monday night and until tomorrow, we have been in residence at The Park House Hotel, Bepton, West Sussex….
Goodwood Day 2
Not a bad day at the coal face, and my call on Stradivarius’ race was bang-on. Well that’s enough preamble…
Goodwood Day 1
As you probably gathered from the results, I did not manage to get hold of Angelina for her input, (see raceweb passim), so it was not a great weekend on the tipping front. My physical condition was also hindered by a conference on Saturday night with the Madeira branch of the Confrerie des Buveurs de…
A la recherche des sous-titres perdu.
My relationship with the works of Proust has much in common with my relationship with Angelina Jolie. If we could get along we would probably be chums, but I wouldn’t necessarily want to tuck myself up in bed with either to relax. Also, I am almost Frenched-out, as Angelina might have said, having had a…
Whoops – but please don’t cancel me.
Now and then one steps out into the bright light of day and steps straight into a pile of the very worst sort of ordure – an innocent comment of a chum’s political statement, namely: Political Correctness is Fascism pretending to be manners. The disputed author was George Carlin, the American stand-up comedian, actor, social…
Let’s hope Mr Jobsworth stays at home.
It’s going to be interesting to see what August 1st holds for Goodwood. I had already decided to attend and was planning to join a throng on Trundle Hill where, on that magnificent and historic site, the less-inherited have always watched the racing. I suspect there will be at least a 1,000 bodies with picnics…
If the room stops spinning, I’ll give you some tips
When trains arrive in stations at 70 mph going sideways, or your marriage to Mr Depp ends up in court, or you have spent many happy hours in the company of your camera-wielding mate, Ghislaine Maxwell, the term “Train Crash” can be fairly applied. At 4:30 this morning, I walked away from just such an…
Never ask “What can possibly go wrong?”, because Murphy will tell you!
I wept all the way to the bank yesterday, with frustration, fury and sorrow. If I am brutally honest, and as many of you will know I am an infinitely lazy bugger. A fading international boulevardier with a penchant for interesting stories, a knowledge of racing which infuriates and delights me in no small measure,…
FICK FACK FOCK the declension of the Latin for stuffed
Some gremlin attacked the writing today and thus refused – unnoticed by me – to update the end product. This meant that the pair of you who read this stuff sadly missed out – probably – on backing one of our best days ever. Sounds like total tosh? Of course, it does – but please…
It never rains, but it pours
A frighteningly quick post today, as once again we face more midweek racing as attention turns to The July meeting at Newmarket and the Dante at York (both courses racing GS). You have to be strong to keep up this sort of relentless pressure and, as I showed in my last post, PROFITABLE! Even I…
In the cold light of day – the weekend wasn’t a total disaster
I have finished grinding my teeth, and I sort of accept Frankie’s apology with his admission on Sunday, that he should have come 2nd. Saturday was a bit of a blur and my eye definitely came off the ball, as I was also running a near-£1k Sweepstake that was effectively paying 17/2 to the winner…
“To win without risk, is to triumph without glory.” Pierre Corneille
I was reminded of Corneille’s view when wondering why I felt quite so deflated after Serpentine’s Derby victory. It is certainly nothing to do with Aidan’s training abilities, although his entry numbers must have an impact on various stakeholders. There is at least something devastatingly simple about Aidan’s racing philosophy and I paraphrase: “Contrary to…
Saturdays TV Races
Well, the Golf is 50/50 having lost Kevin Na in the Cut but with Tyrell Hatton looking to initiate a Day 3 charge. He’s still 16s but its only for 4 places now, whereas we had him for 7 places. Bottas has shortened and is now a 4/1 chance. The Indycar practice was enthralling and…
The Oaks – All you need to know
The picture above was taken one hundred years ago – it is the start of the 1920 Epsom Oaks. The winner Charlebelle is seen second from left and she was bred and owned by Alan Cunliffe at his stud in Tipperary. Her sire, Charles O’Malley was third to Lemberg in the 1910 Epsom Derby. She…
The Derby – Profiles of the Runners & key trends
THE DERBY RUNNERS Racecard No (draw) HORSE NAME (Trainer/Jockey) 1 (5) AMHRAN NA BHFIANN (Aidan O’Brien/William Buick) Unimpressive debut, (13/16 Curragh – Gold Maze 5th). 3yo career might have some shape, but he was 4th LTO with the first three taking minor honours in the Irish Derby. If you drew him in a sweep and it…
Pizzas In, Eyes Down, it’s a proper weekend of sport on the box
I have got to take some time out from my near-constant dismay at the car-crash that passes for nuanced debate these days. It’s just a stream of liberal, Woke, virtue-signalling, prurient guff that a small minority with little education and less common-sense, tirelessly promulgates in the name of change. Instead, I shall heave the shutters…
Fred Archer’s four runners produced a great race.
Went the day well? It rained, it blew, Madame took the shears to the barnet, and the racing turned out to be way better than I had expected – indeed the Fred Archer turned out to be a proper race, where an early tussle possibly left the favourite shy of petrol at the finish and…
Sunday, bloody Sunday
Well stap me vitals, and call me Greta – nine TV races on a drizzly, blowy Sunday afternoon and 56 runners between them. Just goes to show the vital jobs that race-planning, the NTF, and the BHA do in ensuring that public interest is maintained at the highest level. My friend McFly-on-the-wall tells me that…
I’m in no rush to get to the beach today
Am I alone in thinking that the thousands of people on Bournemouth beach, of which at least 25% appeared to be children, might perhaps have been missing the point? Am I going mad when the real news tells me that a very decent primary school headmistress is suspended, because she declared in public that not…
Royal Ascot: Saturday 19th June 2020 – Day Five
Our Literary correspondent, High Rise, sent me a brusque note today about my curmudgeonly criticism of ITV and specifically Francesca Cumani’s hats. He pointed out that the poor girl needs to keep her face free because she is on TV and thus, the wide-brimmed hat a la Ms Eliza Doolittle would not cut it for…
Royal Ascot: Friday 18th June 2020 – Day Four
Really tricky on Thursday, despite the 14 hours notice of impending rain and likely going changes. I was already struggling when I got tucked up by Roger Varian and his observations on Molatham’s last outing on Soft ground. “He’ll hate it” he said or words to that effect. Lumme, it turns out Roger, old darling,…
Royal Ascot: Thursday 18th June 2020 – Day Three
Well, what a cracker for all the Sir Busker owners! Madame had a small wedge on it and we spoke to the rightfully incoherent shareholder afterwards. We might try to speak again tomorrow. We continued our policy of bringing comfort to those more fortunate than us today, by delivering vital supplies to a family in…
Royal Ascot: Wednesday 17th June 2020 – Day Two
With hindsight, the last Magnum of AIX yesterday was possibly a step too far. Suffice it to say, that I was so drunk, I only backed Pyledriver on the grounds that he was being ridden by Sylvestre de Souza. I remember nothing after 9:00 pm, and this morning the idea of solids is too much…
Royal Ascot: Tuesday 16th June 2020 – Day One
No preliminaries, we all know why we’re here…… Kick On! 1:15 pm – Buckingham Palace Handicap (Handicap) “Cripes” as Bunter might say. Tricky or what? I have cogitated about this field for almost 40 minutes and only managed to narrow it down to a dozen. I don’t think the draw is going to matter much,…
Strange times indeed
If you thought this week that Time had taken leave of his/her/its senses, then you are not alone. Most of this week seems to have had every minute of each hour filled with angst at This tribal issue, and ennui at That. Do I really care if Sid and Bob sling a statue into the…
Love is a many-splendored thing
What might we have learned at Newmarket last week? FAR ABOVE could be very good if he goes to The Prix L’Abbaye, where he will almost certainly get the damp ground he prefers, despite spanking 11 others in The Place House Stakes. Does KAMEKO get 10f or 12f? My guess is he’s quite likely to…